Methought I heard a voice cry

Insomnia. It has returned with a vengeance and it looks like it’s in for the long haul (3 days and counting). This unwelcome guest visits me several times a year and swiftly drives me over the edge. A short trip, admittedly, but I’d rather get there in my own time.

I’ve tried working when I can’t sleep. Sometimes it helps. Most times I end up being bored out of my skull but still no closer to unconsciousness than before. Oh – and all that garbage about chamomile tea is just a lot of marketing smoke and mirrors. Maybe if you smoke it…

Things to do when you have insomnia:

  1. Stare at the ceiling and think, “Damn! I have insomnia”. Repeat as necessary.
  2. Head to the study and choose a CD at random.
  3. Listen to Mozart’s ‘Requiem’ four times in a row.
  4. Re-arrange your CD collection alphabetically, numerically and then by colour (while listening to Mozart’s ‘Requiem’ four times in a row).
  5. Re-arrange the neighbour’s pot-plants by moonlight while humming ‘Dies Irae’ from Mozart’s ‘Requiem’.
  6. Curse Mozart and Sussmayr repeatedly until the sun comes up.
  7. Have breakfast.
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24 thoughts on “Methought I heard a voice cry

  1. 8. Read Andrea’s blog (though today’s is pretty good if I do say so myself 🙂

    You got me worried after Tuesday’s post. I won’t ask “what” but it can only be one of two things. I’m just hoping it’s not both.

    As for insomnia, you could always watch reruns of Three’s Company.

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  2. I got one word for ya, KN: Pharmaceuticals. Ok I lied, there’s more, since I don’t want u to go thinking I mean just any drugs… and also just btw I’m not condoning the use of prohibited substances… ‘cos also just btw I’m not into that personally… and no, I’m not on speed…
    What I mean is, have you tried a sleeping tablet?
    That is, if boredom from reading my brief little comment hasn’t sent you off to dreamland already.
    Chin up, Dude!

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  3. Oooohh… I’m soooo with you on this one. Twice this week alone I didn’t sleep a single minute. Last week it was 3 days. Fortunately not consecutive. I suffer all year long but loathe taking sleeping pills so I’ve learned to make insomnia my friend, though definitely a love hate thing.

    Oh yeah, the warm milk thing is a farse too.

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  4. Ugh. I am fortunate enough to have never suffered insomia. Once in a while, I’ll have trouble falling asleep, but I never fail to make up for it in the morning.

    Sorry Kyknoord.

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  5. Insomnia sucks but you sure can have a lot of fun messing around with those that are sleeping. You could play connect the dots on their faces with a marker or draw funny mustaches. Just a thought.

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  6. You poor thing. I can identify all too well. Problem with camomile tea (especially after the first 4 cups) is that you are then up peeing all night… Ill thought plan if I ever heard one.

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  7. Oh dearie me KN. How about listening to re-runs of President Bush’s speeches perhaps. I am not a sufferer of insomnia but have been kept awake and had broken sleep due to dear daughter’s sleep training etc. Is HORRID not to have sleep. Hope it passes and hope you’re ok.

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  8. You must have a lot on your mind, Thats usually what keeps me up. I hope it all comes right soon and that you find peace and sleep again.

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  9. andrea: Oh come now, you don’t need to fish for compliments. Your blog is always a highlight for me and many others.

    terri: Ah yes, our chemical friends. They do work, but I become dependent a little too easily.

    anne: Aha! so that explains the foot in your ID pic. I haven’t tried the bed of nails thing yet. Where are my clippers?

    tj: Sounds like you have a different variety. I think I’m going to take a leaf out of your book and start with nocturnal photograpy.

    barb: A month? Ouch. I hope things improve for you too.

    sophie: There’s the rub. Addictive personality here.

    ZG: That’s because you’re a good person. I’m busy working off my Karmic debt.

    anduin: Oooh yeah! Good thought. [evil laughter]

    morris: Sounds bit too much like work to me, buddy.

    livewire: Yes – and rubber underwear is so damned uncomfortable.

    bee: It will pass in the fullness of time. The annoying thing is that I seldom have insomnia when the sprog wants to keep us up.

    banquo: You’re probably right. Thanks.

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  10. I don’t really have an insomnia problem but I’m a night owl who often falls asleep for an hour or two just after work and then can’t sleep for ages when I eventually try to sometime after midnight. There is nothing worse than that feeling of wanting to sleep and not being able to. In my case I could probably prevent it by ensuring that I don’t have that early evening nap but it’s difficult.

    You could always get pissed, of course. Maybe not the best sort of remedy. 🙂

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  11. I haven’t suffered many maladies in my life but insomnia is one that has reared it’s ugly head time and time again. Fortunately, my longest stint has never exceeded 10 days without a wink. That was only once. Usually the bad trips last only a couple of days for me. Never found use of pharmaceuticals. There was even a time in my incorrigible past, when I smoked the wacky weed, that a friend of mine gave me some “sleeper”. It was really old and dry and one puff, just one, and generally I would be in la la land in minutes. Even that couldn’t wrench my consciences from the grips of reality. Not only that, it made me comatose but awake. Dreadful. Absolutely dreadful. Here’s hoping the sandman brings an extra bag for you…

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  12. Loads on your mind – yes!
    But who can blame you through the run of a 1900s’s play with a drama-queen of a director (didn’t you say so yourself?) and some funny dialogue? Make as I did:
    When insomnia hit during late pregnancy (ruled out in your case?????????)I would wake up hubby some time between 3 and 4 and demand that he tell me “something” (boring stories??), because he didn’t deserve to sleep when I couldn’t! Of any help to you?

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  13. Sleep tight and no dreams tonight. Thinking of you.

    idkknlbt: the sound that comes out of your mouth when you try to have an intelligent converastion with someone after not sleeping 3 nights in a row…

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  14. Welcome to my world. I hope you enjoy your stay, albeit that it seems to be a short one. Please ask for assistance as you please should you not be ready for the madness that will soon follow.

    Expect to get out of this trip many memories: a pale complexion, deep blue rings around your eyes, excessive use of coffee to keep you awake during the day, a significant improvement in your use of rude linguistics to express how you’re feeling, and most of all, a faster metabolism from all the tossing and turning you’ll be doing.

    Feel free to indulge in the host of pink, blue and white tablets and capsules at your disposal. These will help to prolong your journey thanks to their addictive nature, but what’s a couple of hundred bucks in return for a maddening experience.

    Lastly, some visitors might develop twitches. This is absolutely normal and should be considered as another favourable memory.

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  15. nomad: It never really worked for me, even when I did drink. It was fun to watch the ceiling spin, though.

    osmandiaz: I’ll keep and eye out…

    anon: I’ll try most thing once. My wife would probably knock me unconscious if I tried to disturb her slumbers.

    banquo: Ta 🙂

    paintingchef: That sounds like another tee-shirt design to me.

    ekapa: [twitch]

    scott: I find Helmut Lotti vaguely irritating, like a car idling. I definitely can’t fall asleep to that.

    paul: It’s interesting that so many bloggers are also insomniacs. Coincidence?

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