You know the old joke about relationships: “Men are never satisfied. When they are single, they wish they were with someone and when they are with someone, they wish they were dead”?
I’ve been a de facto bachelor for about six months now and while I am prone to episodes of industrial-strength dejection, I think it’s safe to say that I’m also a lot less stressed. Being alone certainly sucks, but it sure beats the alternative sometimes. When I’m not at the top of my game, the worst I might do is contemplate a goblet of hemlock as a pre-dinner cocktail – as opposed to some of my friends, who consider using chainsaws and ice-picks as hair accessories on their significant others.
And yet – and yet, despite all the dictates of good sense, people still end up living together. I can’t help wondering if we share a common ancestor with the moth.
the other side of the mountain 
Couldn’t it be assimilated to a hero complex? You know, sacrificing your every chance at happiness just to make sure that the species lives on…
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Moth – maybe, I prefer butterfly. I think for you experiencing the blackness that follows a divorce, living through the sadness and feeling it all, allows you when the time has passed to pack it away in a black box never to be experienced again, not to be packed as baggage for the next relationship. Kyn, there will be another one perhaps not today but one day. I think it also gets so much harder in C.T. when comes the winter months people start hibernating in a big way, and the lonliness sets in – one can be lonely in a relationship, the one relationship that we keep for the rest of our lives is the one with ourselves.
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Do I detect a yearning for
perfumed filled rooms,
tealights gently glowing,
cosy cuddles by the fire-
place.
Or is it a bit of both–
bragging or complaining??
Where have all the CT flowers
gone?!!
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Being with someone is not the same as being with the right someone… I would rather be alone than in a bad relationship but that is something that I had to learn through time and of course I am now lucky enough to know that there are good ones too…
I don’t believe that there is only one right person but getting someone who is right is much more important than just getting someone.
You are wise to lick your wounds alone and wait for time and tide to heal you.
I have wondered why moths are so drawn to light though… seems like they really ought not to be able sleep through the day…
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let’s form a society and go on strike- with picketing and everything… we can even hand over a memorandum!
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Bloody good point!
I’m four years into my relationship, and we don’t live together. And that’s why we’re four years in!
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Uh, you mean ice picks aren’t appropriate hair accessories for others? Hmm. I wondered what all the screaming was about. Funny you should mention hemlock; that’s my standard response at work if anyone asks me if they can bring me anything to drink. Well, either that or beer.
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I hear hemlock is great with a dash of cinnamon in it.
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The best thing about living with someone is that you can be uninhibited about your irritations and petty rages – use them as a sounding board for your rages against life and the machine…probably one of the reasons why some relationships don’t last.
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anne: With 7 billion souls on the planet, I think the species can manage just fine without me.
Tammy: Ah, but you know what they say about those who fail to learn the lessons of history.
P & E: Time to recalibrate the old detector, I think. At the moment, I have a yearning for peanut butter.
Caroline: Moths have a basic inability to distinguish between the moon and every other light in the entire world. This tends to screw up their sense of perspective. Similarly, a lot of people have a basic inability to distinguish between a potential soulmate and a fuck-buddy. This tends to screw up their sense of perspective.
angel: Forward the revolution. Who do we give the memorandum to?
Lee: You’re wise beyond your years, young Lee.
LiVEwiRe: The coffee here at work is very hemlockesque. You do get used to it, though.
Terri: No, that’s bollocks. It’s cloves that makes all the difference.
Reluctant Nomad: You’ve given this some thought. I can tell, you know.
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I cant be alone I have to have people around me. There is some days that it is nice being alone but 80% of the time I have to have people around me
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MMmm. Ditto, KN, ditto.
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you can be with 100’s of people and still be alone.. it is the 1 person that makes a difference..
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One of my friends always felt lonly and unloved. Then she met a guy who really liked (maybe even loved) her… she decided to go out with him not becuase she felt the same way, but just not to spend another day alone…. and i actually understand her reasoning, but that doesnt make it right.
Ps. Tammy gives good advice!
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ah, good sense. I’ve heard rumours about it. 😉
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(sound of rushing wind) wooooosh… Hi, just popping in quickly to say “HI” – so “HI”…. woooooosh!
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dude, there’s always SOMEONE on the news handing over a memorandum… who do THEY give them to?
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Believe it or not, kyknoord, it is possible to find a woman who loves you forever and whom you will love forever. Took me 5 tries, but I got it right….
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To take you mind off relationships (or maybe not) you are tagged!
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whatalotoffun I don’t mind having people around. I just don’t want to have to live with them.
It is the question: Always nice to find a fellow anthropentomomologist.
Elize: Especially in a crowded lift.
tripeak: I understand her reasoning, too. Doesn’t mean I agree with it, though.
Esther: Some of them are even true.
Spookie: Been at the beans again?
angel: Damn! I was hoping you would know.
Ol’ Hoss: Man, I admire your stamina.
Caroline: Curses.
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I’ve just remembered that the Human Genome project concluded that we share a helluva lot of genes with the fruit fly…maybe that’s the common ancestor you refer to?
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The power of the…(nevermind);-) They say married men live longer than single men, although married me are much more willing to die.
With the divorce rate being as high as it is, you’d think that we would learn. (She with two failed marraiges said)
Can “love” really be explained logically? I don’t think so.
Hope your monday is a good one kyknoord! 😉
3T
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