Cold feat

This would probably have been my typical winter rant about how Capetonian motorists shove their brains into the glove compartment every time it rains, if it hadn’t been for one individual who managed to rise above the steaming masses and really piss me off.

But first, a little digression – one of the ironies of living in Cape Town is that although a lot of our tax money ends up going down the drain, very little of it is spent on maintaining the storm drains. Consequently, all the road muck that has built up before a decent downpour (litter, vegetation, flattened squirrels, paralytic vagrants etc.) gets washed into catchpits that were already clogged with similar city detritus long before the clouds even began to gather. Result: faster than you can say “Holy shit! Where did all those enormous puddles come from?”, enormous puddles appear everywhere.

Most motorists approach these temporary reservoirs with some degree of caution. Most. Just as I reached my place of work, a certain Mr. Look-At-My-Big-Four-Wheel-Drive sent his Idiotmobile* hydroplaning through an impressive road-spanning puddle, thereby creating a wave large enough to make any Hawaiian feel homesick.

Having to dry my shoes and socks on the aircon at work was not an auspicious start to the weekend.

* it is surely no coincidence that ‘pajero’ means ‘wanker’, in Spanish

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21 thoughts on “Cold feat

  1. Ooh you’re all tense and angry now. Don’t deny it, I’m very perceptive.
    If I say I’ve referred you to Fence for quoting, will you smile?
    Here’s a good boy.

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  2. Here in New England, it’s been rain on top of rain. One day (Tuesday I think) it rained all 24 hours. There’s enough rivers and creeks to carry away the water, but the further northeast you look, those creeks aren’t enough and flooding persists.

    Have a good weekend anyways, despite the not auspicious start to your weekend. (Yes, I had to look that word up.)

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  3. ooooh- it’s people like that that i wish would get stuck for a couple of hours!
    i wish i could put a bull-bar on the front of my corsa, i don’t want to do serious damage- all i want to do is touch them lightly and leave a little mark that will bug them for weeks & remind them of what a jerk they were!

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  4. Catchpits, puddles & Hawaiians … this is why I come here! Just a few of my favorite things, la la la …

    Can’t wait to hear how the knife “acts” this weekend, natch!

    Damp smooch,
    The Tart

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  5. IITQ: Dripping. Ahahahaha.

    anne: I’ll smile for you, Anne.

    Bryan: Ah well, at least the creeks are flowing with water – paddles notwithstanding.

    angel: I’d prefer to have them walk a mile in my shoes.

    The Tart: The understudy knife has been pressed into service & thus far, has done a convincing job.

    Pro & Edel: True, it usually takes a lot less than that ๐Ÿ™‚

    Ol’ Hoss: I’m gonna write a letter to the Mayor as soon as I get done here.

    Brian the Mennonite: Let’s hope the dude doesn’t turn out to be chicken, ‘cos then I’ll be choking the… well, you get the picture.

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  6. This morning’s mistiness means that tomorrow I can sit behind ANOTHER 4×4 and tan gently in the billion candlepower of it’s forgotten Rear Fog Light.
    I lost my eyebrows in a similar incident on Friday.

    Folks, here is the Traffic Rant that Kyknoord managed not to write…

    I failed.

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  7. Fence: And a good excuse it is, too.

    Caroline: I haven’t managed to get all the water out of the sole, so I have a strange squelchy walk now.

    Flo: Fun ‘n’ games. My paranoid side can’t help wondering if we’re all part of some bizarre social experiment and 4x4s are the ‘challenge’ stimuli.

    Reluctant Nomad: In truth, it’s more of a local animal theme. Perhaps the Stormers should consider a name-change to The Baboons?

    Anon: Of course! I shall wait with breathless anticipation for my nomination for this year’s Nobel Peace Prize.

    Spookie: There were some highights ๐Ÿ™‚

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  8. I think It’s going to be a really wet and rainy winter.

    The pointers to this are;

    The tuna season was long last year and now , when they are supposed to be biting, there not.

    It was really hot last summer.

    The stars seem sort of out of line compared to what they were over the last 10 years.

    Global warming seems to be making Southern Africa a Mediteranian climate and turning Cape Town into a South Georgia Island climate.

    So , buy electric cars to reduce carbon emissions, wear a wetsuit to work and take a boogy board along to surf down hosptal bend to avoid the mindless traffic.

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