blog tag n bastard child of a chain letter and pyramid scheme; poor cousin of the meme.
I’ve been tagged. Again. From multiple directions, this time. Apparently Other-Duke, The Granny Wrangler and Champagne Heathen would all have me reveal more about myself. You guys are new around here, so just this once I’m prepared to waive the usual $20-00 application fee and a picture of yourself in the buff.
For the first tag, I have to list ten people I’d invite to a dinner party and specify where I’d hold it. That’s easy – I’d ask Manto Tshabalala-Msimang; Charles Nqakula; Jacob Zuma; my ex-wife’s attorney; The old bat from downstairs; Mr Head; Noeleen Maholwana-Sangqu; Graeme Smith; Tim Modise; and finally, the retarded fucker who carved me up on the freeway this morning.
Dinner would be served at the top of Lion’s Head. This will limit the collateral damage when I hit the table centrepiece with a low-yield tactical nuke.
Tag number two requires me to list five things you (probably) didn’t know about me:
- I once spoke to an alien. (It was dark, I was drunk and it was a Port Jackson tree)
- I used to wear nylon stockings when I was in the army (I was stationed in Bethlehem in the Free State, where it gets seriously cold in winter. Besides, I have great legs)
- Okay, I had great legs (now they’re all scarred from my various close encounters of the tarmac kind)
- I have posted nude pix of myself on Flickr (…and the hit counter spins out of control)
- Too late! They aren’t there any more (Mwahahahahahahah!)
That was fun. I hereby pass the flame on to the following worthies:
Anne, Mandy J, Luke, Dolce and Forgottenmachine. Take your time. I’ll wait.
the other side of the mountain 
I spoke to that same Port Jackson tree. As it turned out, it was just a gust of wind blowing through the leaves.
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Fuck you’re hysterical.
The nuke, the naked pics, which you’ve now removed.
PS: Still would like to see those legs you spoke about though…;)
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That’s the 3rd LOL you’ve got outta me in the last 24 hours, KN! You’re on a roll, buddy.
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Ooo … yer eveeel.
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chitty: Mine was the strong silent type.
peas: All in good time. All in good time.
terri: Get ready for #4. I’m e-mailing you the shots I canned from my photostream.
luke: Oh yes.
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FASCINATING really! I’d send you a photo of me in the buff after reading those!
And as for Peas seeing your legs…she is in the Cape very soon….is the date on?!?
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Leggs … we must see the leggies!
Hope Peas has a camera, for her CT mission!
Smooches,
The Tart
; )
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Noeleen… good choice. That woman’s show is without a doubt the most pathetic excuse for a ‘talk show’ in the history of the country, and I am including Felicia in that list. I think she wanted to be Oprah so badly that she ate her.
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dude- people should pay you for doing their tags- i’ve seen that “10 people” list a few times, but none near as entertaining as yours with the whole tactical nuke angle!
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Information overload, right there…
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Might I add that those nude piccies were very tasteful?
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champs: It’s a deal! I’ll be watching my inbox with eager anticipation 😉 As to your question, the delightful Ms Peas has been rather silent on the subject, so I can only speculate.
the tart: Down girl.
moonflake: Aaaaaaaaah!!! You said the “F” word!
angel: Creative violence is always entertaining. Just ask George W.
anne: It helps if you try not to think too deeply about any of it.
katt: You might. It might even be true.
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I wonder if the Bishop of Southwark spoke to the same alien or Port Jackson tree this past weekend?
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Spoke to a Port Jackson tree?
Were you simply just drunk?
Funny, my dinner list looked remarkably similar to yours.
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Kykie – I’ll be emailing you with regards to a meeting somewhere when I head to the lovely city. How does somewhere between the 23-27 December sound? 😉
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alan: Could be. Then again, maybe he was hit by a teeny tiny meteorite?
jam: Maybe we could go halves on the invitations?
peas: That sounds perfect. Another reason for an inbox vigil 😀
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Yeah go on..show us them lovely pins of yours.
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Dear Leggs,
How do I do the smiley thing? Help!
Smooch,
The Tart
; *
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wendz: Maybe if I see a little quid pro quo?
the tart: Easy, you just do this 😀 or this 😯 or even this
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Sorry, I couldn’t resist. You can find a comprehensive list here 🙄
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Done.
Or, you know… attempted, anyway.
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Goddammit!
Why in the hell would you tag me*? I still have to do the one Kat threw my way.
And am I supposed to do both? The dinner table one and the five things one (to go with the eight things from Kat)?
Gawd! 13 things? 13?? That’s just too much. Plus 10 people for dinner? That’s a really awkward number. The 10 people will amuse themselves while I sit around as the odd one in my usual state of being unable to make conversation.
* You are seriously evil. I mean,I know I’m stating the obvious, but it obviously needs stating.
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oops. only just found this now. but i was carvorting in CT at the time so i’m forgiven right? Naked pic and 20 bucks on its way…
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