Excerpt from a recent conversation with a colleague:
“Did you miss me?”
“Oh, were you gone?”
If I could properly harness the power of such indifference a little bit further up the management ladder, I wouldn’t need to show up for work. Incidentally, the above discussion took place a short while ago, just after I’d returned from Stellenbosch, where I’d been attending a course.
Yup, another one. I reckon my brain must have filled up ages ago, so anything I learn now will simply push out the old knowledge to make way for the new. Frankly, I don’t think it’s worth the risk – I might suddenly forget how to read, or how to tie my shoelaces, or how to wipe my own arse+. I therefore figured I owed it to my employers to absorb as little as possible, in order to preserve the knowledge I do have and left the serious business of learning to the more eager minds filling the lecture hall.
My eyes did unglaze briefly near the end of the course, when one of the presenters fired up PowerPoint and began to abuse one defenseless apostrophe after another with gleeful abandon. It give’s me cold shiver’s when I think of the horror’s the poor thing’s had to endure.
Fear Factor for punctuation, if you will.
+ in which case, I’d be perfect for government service
Go on – enter. You know you want to.