Incidentally, my nova-like talent is featured this week on A Column Inch. So to all my detractors who have insinuated that I am a lazy git, I say poo to you with knobs on!
the other side of the mountain
difficile est saturam non scribere
Incidentally, my nova-like talent is featured this week on A Column Inch. So to all my detractors who have insinuated that I am a lazy git, I say poo to you with knobs on!
the other side of the mountain 
Leaf me a alone. You’re barking!
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It’s amazing how long conversations that start with “can I have a word” can take. I preempt them by directing people to the “Before-you-ask-the-answer-is-no” poster on the wall next to my desk. If that fails I direct them to the one below it “I-can-only-please-one-person-a-day. Today-is-NOT-your-day-:tomorrow-doesn’t-look-good-either. Try-next-week”. If that doesn’t work, threatening to bludgeon them to death with a stapler usually does. Works wonders 😉
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Argh – whilst I do feel your pain I now have lyrics and melody of Build me up Buttercup stuck in my head and I may have to kill myself now… Tra la…I need you more than anyone darling you know that I have from the staaaarrt to build me up….oh no I feel nauseous
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that is one of my favourite songs of all time… wanna dance? 😉
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This is why they should have strip clubs in airport lounges. If you’re going to kill time waiting for your flight you might as well kill you expense budget.
I wonder if swinging around the pole qualifies you for frequent flyer miles?
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One man’s very quick chat is another man’s homicide. Time eh!
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when asked “got a minute?” by a squirrel poking his head around my office door, i now respond “yes. excactly one. talk fast.” Surprisingly, this works…
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dolce: Up the wrong tree, perhaps?
parenthesis: I suspect your methods may be a bit too subtle to work in the engineering environment.
charmskool: That’s probably from drinking too much coffee. I accept no responsibility whatsoever.
stef: Fine, but I lead this time, okay?
revo: Sadly, I squandered my entire expense budget on a cup of tea.
beaverboosh: One of the reasons time management is so important.
daisyfae: It’s got to be worth a try. Cleaning my fingernails with a machete while pointedly looking at my watch is starting wear a little thin.
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I’m starting to like your boss, dear. I feel I could learn so much…
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Nah. I just think you haven’t twigged. Maybe you should consider branching out? Maybe you’re too rooted where you are? You need to grow a little, bud.
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P.S. and you’re still a lazy git. *grin*
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mrs B: I’ll set up a meeting. Can I use your place for long-term storage while you’re busy with him?
dolce: I wood, but I think I prefer to vegetate.
P.S. I bend like a reed in the breeze of your abuse.
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Holy hell. I’ve got to stop coming her with a mouthful of coffee. My laptop is beginning to resemble one of those weird dotty paintings by Seurat.
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“No guts, no glory.” Somebody needs to take a switch to you, young man.
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mandy: I’m glad to see I’m making a strong impression on you.
ol’ hoss: Stop, you’re gettin’ me all exciticated!
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Ja. Okay. I retract my words.
-lazy ass.
I’ll eat that hat now.
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shebee: Would you like fries with that?
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who said you’re lazy!?! tell me right now and i’ll take care of them!!!
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Kykie Kykie Kykie. There is no such thing as a quick chat to the client. santa clause, i hear you ask hopefully? nope. Easter bunny – a lie. Now, just because i want to protect you from the bad people in the world, herewith a few pointers on what NOT to believe:
1: “I am only going out for one drink”
2: “I am never drinking again”
3: “I am a social smoker”
4: “I just want to hold you (in my underwear)”
5: “It’s my first time”
6: “but I loooooove you”
7: “Size doesn’t matter”
8: “Nobody will ever know”
9: “I won’t come in your mouth”
10: “I am just going to have a quick chat with the client”
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angel: Oh good. I was planning to take care of them myself, but frankly, I couldn’t be arsed.
anicker: What can I say? I am a wide-eyed innocent.
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gives new meaning to the question: ‘tea, coffee or me?’
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