Oooo I HATE those arsecreeping, disease-ridden, painful people who drag their sick bodies into the office (where they do NOTHING but hack and splutter over other people) then they finally succeed in infecting the entire world (well ok at least 70% of the staff) and get all prissy-pinchlips about your going home to bed when it’s your turn to get the worst ever case of terminal snot and lung spit known to humankind.
i used to “work through” sickness – kept to myself, “walking dead” shuffle through the hall to my office, and an “unclean” sign on the door. Then i stopped giving a shit, started staying home, eating drugs and watching soap operas. Waaaay better to stay home. Unless you hate your coworkers… Then, you need to go in, and be sure to make several pots of coffee at the community urn! Lick the coffee stirrers while you’re at it! Inspect all lunches in the community fridge.
betenoir: An occupational hazard for proctologists. dolce:“I feel a bit warm. Feel my forehead. Does my tongue look yellow to you?” charmskool: Disease is the new whip of the modern masochist. mandy: I thought those were just to keep his nose on. miss M: A few, but most of them involve feigning illness, rather than actually contracting it. daisy: It’s a tough choice sometimes.
hmmm…arsecreeper’s disease…
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“Oh, thank god. I’ve just been in an Ebola/Bird Flu/SARs infested area and I was worried I might be carrying…but if you don’t mind…”
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Oooo I HATE those arsecreeping, disease-ridden, painful people who drag their sick bodies into the office (where they do NOTHING but hack and splutter over other people) then they finally succeed in infecting the entire world (well ok at least 70% of the staff) and get all prissy-pinchlips about your going home to bed when it’s your turn to get the worst ever case of terminal snot and lung spit known to humankind.
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Even though Michael Jackson’s a psycho he may be onto something with those nose scarves.
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My boss does that. I’m kind of hoping she passes it onto me so that I can NOT come to work.
Perhaps I should grab her coffee mug and drink out of it? Maybe I can get her to cough on me?
Any ideas?
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i used to “work through” sickness – kept to myself, “walking dead” shuffle through the hall to my office, and an “unclean” sign on the door. Then i stopped giving a shit, started staying home, eating drugs and watching soap operas. Waaaay better to stay home. Unless you hate your coworkers… Then, you need to go in, and be sure to make several pots of coffee at the community urn! Lick the coffee stirrers while you’re at it! Inspect all lunches in the community fridge.
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wear a plastic apron over your work clothes… those phlegm projectiles are the worst to get out of a white shirt…
*ok I just grossed myself out a little*
have you noticed that sick people don’t cover their mouths when they cough?… honestly!
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betenoir: An occupational hazard for proctologists.
dolce: “I feel a bit warm. Feel my forehead. Does my tongue look yellow to you?”
charmskool: Disease is the new whip of the modern masochist.
mandy: I thought those were just to keep his nose on.
miss M: A few, but most of them involve feigning illness, rather than actually contracting it.
daisy: It’s a tough choice sometimes.
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I’m always amused by the “related topic” links your posts inspire…
HIV Bloopers? wtf?
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Hey, what can I say. I like to go the whole hog.
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betenoir: It would make more sense if you ever met some of my relatives.
miss M: I prefer to bring home the bacon.
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Fantastic.
Want to marry me and feed me the bacon?
(somehow that sounded better in my own head)
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I didn’t know you could catch a cold from someone else from salad tossing!
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Kindly deposit stool samples in labelled bottles next to the photocopier.
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miss M: Awww. You’re so sweet, but I am already involved with someone.
beaverboosh: You’d be surprised.
scott: And there I thought the smell was caused by an electrical fault.
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The bacon?
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I get a very fine word picture out of this tale. Nicely told, Old Bean.
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