I think you should have suggested they have the team building at the funeral. Three legged pallbearer races through the tombstones. Coffin tossing. Sychronised wailing. And a rousing sing-a-long of Funeral Hits Zone to round it off. Belter!
Our team building events used to be paintball until they worked out I could run faster and shoot straighter than they could. Also the event organisers frowned on knee-capping and taking hostages.
giant kyknoord cardboard cutouts? will you have an “action” version, and a “listening attentively” one as well as a “kyknoord tosses his head back in laughter at the boss’ joke”?
these must be for sale on the internet… and you can offer a buy 3 get the “skips out because of a funeral sad kyk” inflatable doll.
betenoir: Certainly does. Especially when they start adding the concrete. thrills: So my dad keeps telling me. Still not tempted, though. dolce: Followed by a firewalk at the crematorium. I’ll draft a memo to management. idlelayabout: Hey, if it was fun, it wouldn’t be team-building, would it? daisy: I have a nasty suspicion that the inflatable doll would be used for recreational purposes. I’m not sure the world is ready for that. nursemyra: Good idea. If the boss got “nailed in the end” (*snort*), he might not be so uptight about everything.
Isn’t this the fifth time you’ve used that “Uncle’s Funeral” excuse? And you only have one uncle? Hmmm… Guess we know who’ll be in charge of the next team building exercise!
uncle keith: Oddly enough, a lot of my relatives have said the same thing. robin: You and Uncle Keith should form a club. miss M: Well technically, there IS a “me”. gnukid: I only have one uncle now.
I have a direct correlation between being forced to attend team building exercises and resigning. I find it livens up the final “What I have learnt about myself as a result of *insert acronym for meaningless psychobabble crap used to make some quasi-celebrity famous here*” speech no end.
Also, then the boss can’t really crap on you when you claim that the deep spiritual awareness brought on by the team building exercises has caused you to realise that you really aren’t happy with your life the way it is…and that your current job is part of the baggage that needs to be discarded…
Sorry about your uncle though Kyk (I suck at sympathy. Need an HVAC calc done?)
miss M: It works really well if you include GPS coordinates, too. gnukid: Ah c’mon, I was just teasing you, I actually have two left schrödinger’s cat: An excellent idea (the only drawback is that I’ll actually have to attend a team building session for it to work). And by the way, thanks.
the other side of the mountain 
…well, there IS more likelihood of booze, and if you’re really traumatised, you can leave any time…
teambuilding sucks.
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teambuilding sucks. except when they make you play lawn bowls. contrary to popular belief, it’s actually fun.
and harder than it looks.
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I think you should have suggested they have the team building at the funeral. Three legged pallbearer races through the tombstones. Coffin tossing. Sychronised wailing. And a rousing sing-a-long of Funeral Hits Zone to round it off. Belter!
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Our team building events used to be paintball until they worked out I could run faster and shoot straighter than they could. Also the event organisers frowned on knee-capping and taking hostages.
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giant kyknoord cardboard cutouts? will you have an “action” version, and a “listening attentively” one as well as a “kyknoord tosses his head back in laughter at the boss’ joke”?
these must be for sale on the internet… and you can offer a buy 3 get the “skips out because of a funeral sad kyk” inflatable doll.
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how about coffin building as a team building experience? and the boss gets nailed in at the end…..
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betenoir: Certainly does. Especially when they start adding the concrete.
thrills: So my dad keeps telling me. Still not tempted, though.
dolce: Followed by a firewalk at the crematorium. I’ll draft a memo to management.
idlelayabout: Hey, if it was fun, it wouldn’t be team-building, would it?
daisy: I have a nasty suspicion that the inflatable doll would be used for recreational purposes. I’m not sure the world is ready for that.
nursemyra: Good idea. If the boss got “nailed in the end” (*snort*), he might not be so uptight about everything.
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I’d kill a relative just to have a funeral to go to, instead of go to a team building event.
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Ugh! Team building! The dumbest idea ever invented by petty beurocrats! I’d kill my damn uncle to have an excuse to blow one off!
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Or you could go to the Team Building and when you play that stupid trust game you could just step aside as your colleague falls backwards.
They’d never invite you again.
There is no I in Team – but there is also no Us, You, Me or Together.
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Isn’t this the fifth time you’ve used that “Uncle’s Funeral” excuse? And you only have one uncle? Hmmm… Guess we know who’ll be in charge of the next team building exercise!
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uncle keith: Oddly enough, a lot of my relatives have said the same thing.
robin: You and Uncle Keith should form a club.
miss M: Well technically, there IS a “me”.
gnukid: I only have one uncle now.
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Oh there is too! SWEET!
Now I can tell those Team Builders where to shove it.
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well… don’t i feel like the total shit… apologies…
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I have a direct correlation between being forced to attend team building exercises and resigning. I find it livens up the final “What I have learnt about myself as a result of *insert acronym for meaningless psychobabble crap used to make some quasi-celebrity famous here*” speech no end.
Also, then the boss can’t really crap on you when you claim that the deep spiritual awareness brought on by the team building exercises has caused you to realise that you really aren’t happy with your life the way it is…and that your current job is part of the baggage that needs to be discarded…
Sorry about your uncle though Kyk (I suck at sympathy. Need an HVAC calc done?)
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miss M: It works really well if you include GPS coordinates, too.
gnukid: Ah c’mon, I was just teasing you, I actually have two left
schrödinger’s cat: An excellent idea (the only drawback is that I’ll actually have to attend a team building session for it to work). And by the way, thanks.
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