There is no “I” in “team”, but there’s always a “me” in “meeting”

Corporate tradition beats logic and steals its lunch money once again

Apparently work doesn’t count as “real” work if there is any residue of efficiency attached to it. It also seems that solutions to problems need to be tempered with plenty of hot air to be fully functional.

I sometimes wonder how I manage to get anything done at all.

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36 thoughts on “There is no “I” in “team”, but there’s always a “me” in “meeting”

  1. It’s a variation on the question, “If a tree falls in the woods and nobody hears it…” This one is, “If a solution is reached with no meeting…” I never could get the answer to these puzzle things. Guess your boss can’t either.

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  2. have you tried a “meeting cost calculator’ in your power point slides? estimate the hourly salary of each attendee, and keep a running clock of how much the meeting is costing your corporate masters. when it gets to maybe $1,000, an alarm goes off. At $2,000? the projector shuts down…

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  3. We had an interesting meeting yesterday. The unit leader called it and invited all the engineer types. It was to be a “refresher” on our company’s “Performance Management” process. He even sent out an e-mail reminder about an hour before the scheduled start. Really, it came across as more of an advance warning that many people are going to find themselves in the lower end of the “forced distribution” they slot all of us into.

    What a load of bollocks.

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  4. Dante would have been charmed by your company and it’s “vision”. I’m sure he would have written something quite classic about it. Oh wait a minute…..he already did. Not sure which circle of Hell your particular situation is in but it’s sure hellish!

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  5. There are days when the only thing I do is arrange meetings. Or reschedule them. Or postpone them. Or cancel them. Or re-instate them. On Monday I am so telling them about this telephone thing. They probably won’t believe me but it’s worth a try. Right?

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    • You’re probably right, but with the current state of the industry, I’m happy just to be working. Of course, when i say “happy”, I mean it in the “severely irritated” sense of the word.

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