Translational relationships

Do you speak Corporatese?


39 thoughts on “Translational relationships

  1. My personal favorite reply to an ectensive e-mail tirade, complaining of injustice and failed leadership on my part?

    “Got it. Thanks.” which means “you just wasted an hour of your time composing a message that took me ten minutes to read and a microsecond to dismiss as meaningless. Have a nice day”.

    The management equivqalent of pinching a loaf.


  2. Next time I want to say “FOD”, I’ll say “Of Course!” and in the back of my mind, I’ll be saying “FOD”.

    You sir, have been spared from my wrath when I take over the world.


    • You’re right. It was only after my divorce that I understood what my ex-wife was trying to tell me. It’s a bit graphic to repeat here, but it basically involved spiky cacti and certain bodily orifices.


  3. I think I’ll come to you for all my office-speak translational needs in future. Although, I have come to learn that “Can you minutes that, please?” translates to “Please write that down. I think it might be important, but I wasn’t listening.”


  4. “It’s urgent.” / “I can’t prioritise.”

    I love you. Really, really love you. It’s (sexually) frustrating that someone who is as bitter as I am is not even in my hemisphere.


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