“We don’t want to send the wrong message to kids.”
ORLY? Why not? Surely it’s a sacred duty? The sooner they learn that the world is a harsh place full of politicians and telemarketers, the sooner they’ll stop expecting cake and embrace coprophagia.
I recently discovered that I had issued the wrong revision of a construction drawing to site. The contractor has already built the affected portion of work, so there will be delays and additional costs while he fixes the cock-up.
The actual amount is negligible – it’s about 0.2% of the total project cost – but when I told the client about it, he started behaving as though he’d caught me enjoying carnal intimacy with his dog in the master bedroom (Hah! As if I would ever get caught!).
I was tasked with compiling the necessary facts and figures relating to “the case”, so that he can – I don’t know – brandish it threateningly and foam at the mouth some more.
There is no doubt that he’s justified in being pissed off, but it seems a tad sadistic to demand that I provide him with the very stick he intends to beat me with.
Every year our marketing department circulates a memo encouraging the peons to augment their wardrobes with ghastly new corporate-branded clothing. It’s a rather heavy-handed way of telling us to conform or else.
It wouldn’t be so bad if there was something in the catalogue that I could actually bring myself to wear, but the company “look” essentially involves beige chinos and pale blue polycotton shirts – i.e. the uniform of dead souls.
I don’t think the office is ready for the magnificence of my dragon onesie just yet.
Based on a true story.
You really expect me remember some random detail from a project we archived over ten years ago? I find your abundance of faith disturbing.