Nocturnal emissions

That sucks, man!
I make a point of trying to clear my inbox before I leave the office in the evening. That way – in theory, at any rate – I can start the new day with a clean slate.

However, in the ongoing grudge match between Theory and Practice, Theory is taking a severe pounding. For some inexplicable reason, some people insist on sending me emails after hours so that my inbox is always clogged when I get to work the next morning.

Perhaps they expect me to be impressed by their apparent diligence, but I just find it annoying. And kind of sad. I mean, fuck, even if you don’t have a life, you can at least pretend that you do.

If you’re a vampire, then you should be out feeding on the blood of the living or touching up your sparkles or whatever. Your street cred may have been utterly destroyed by Stephenie Meyer, but really, you should not – I repeat, NOT – be hunched over your keyboard demanding project progress updates from me.

56 thoughts on “Nocturnal emissions

  1. Maybe you should Practice the life out of that Theory rather than let it continue to get pounded.

    psst..don’t tell Jebus H. Krispies but I say “FIRST”


  2. My approach? Leave work early, but schedule emails to go out at ungodly hours. Then the boss *thinks* you’re a slave to the machine, and you’re having your second cocktail. FTW!


  3. Someone sent me an email at 4-26am on Mon. 4-26am!!!! He wanted me to attend a meeting in his place. Next week! It wasn’t even that urgent.
    That has to top the people with “no life” list.
    Bloody vampire!


  4. The worst is when they put a read-receipt on it. I usually just delete all emails sent in the early hours of the morning without reading them. I mean really, who thinks straight and has reasonable requests at that hour?


  5. Erm…should one admit to being old enough to have dealt with telex? No, didn’t think so so I shan’t. (I shall now go back to my real life…a glass of sparkles, a man…yep! that’s about it.)
    I’ll just email wotsisface about our meeting…


  6. Of course what some sad, sad, pointless, masturbating bastards do is set up their email so that a message can be postponed a few hours and then go home, so that, in fact, they are only pretending to have no life.

    Of course, this is great cover for real vampires: “But officers, this drained, lifeless cropse can have nothing to do with me: I was at the office all night. Here, look at all the emails I sent…”


      • “…what some sad, sad, pointless, masturbating bastards do is set up their email so that a message can be postponed a few hours and then go home, so that, in fact, they are only pretending to have no life.”

        No, no seriously. I WAS having a cocktail. What’s that you say? That hair on my hands? *ahem*….


  7. See? I’m commenting at 4:16 PM!!! PM!! Because, I like SOOOO TOTALLY have a life. A life that does not suck!

    Oh, who am I kidding… I’m just an old bat with reversed insomnia.

    Does this mean that my nocturnal dispatches and musings and comments have all ended up at the bottom of the pile though? *Sob* Or are blog contacts in a different pile than colleagues? A SPECIAL pile?


  8. I’ll try to remember not to email you in the wee hours. It’s going to be hard to restrain myself, but I believe I can beat my desire to be a pain in the neck… I’ll crack on with knitting a doily instead, okay? 😉


  9. I have people who call and leave voicemails after I’ve gone home for the day asking if they can come in that day or will I call them back today. I mean, if it’s 6pm, what are they thinking? That maybe I live there at the office, working around the clock?


  10. Oh my God, I can sooooo relate, well, if we substitute ‘receiving 3am emails’ with ‘receiving 3am screams from my toddler’, who seems to think that I am, like, on call 24hours a day….


  11. Woah. I go away for a few weeks (Google reader) and your whole blog has a makeover? I like it. Much modener*.

    I’m one of those losers of which you speak. I have no life. Sad panda.


    * Of course that’s a real word!


  12. Vampires need to be beheaded. The stake through the heart is just to hold them in place while you chop their heads off. Oh, and crosses don’t work against Jewish vampires.


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